Obituary of Matthew Spitler

Matthew, we love you and miss you and are looking forward to our reunion with you, with the Messiah Jesus. To Matthew, Love Mom I miss you son! Ten stories high Ten flights of stairs Ten floors too many for his body to bear. He broke his body, he broke our hearts, when he took that last step to meet his Lord. I play it over and over again in my mind. Him on the rooftop standing alone, one final moment, one last decision, he'd take one step, and arrive in heaven. a Mother weeps, her endless tears tear stained cheeks leaving their marks, as her tears dry, the stains remain, hidden within, scarring her heart. The Father cries softly, once and awhile. releasing it gently, when it builds like a wave. But his pain runs deep, deep in his veins, until it reaches his heart, leaving it's mark. He hears his wife cry, endlessly He listens to her sobs It makes him weak for He knows, as she weeps, there not just her tears, not just her sobs, wrenching deep in her soul. They are his cries, they are his sobs, They share as one. Pain gripping the father's heart as The mother wails, they hold on to each other melding as one. the pain like no other as they lower their son. Down to his grave Down to the Ground while someone is singing "He was lost, but now found". The son came out of his mother's womb The boy, his father's seed She gave birth to this boy, perfect and complete. The father stood tall and proud The day he was born for this special boy, whom he held in his arms, this was his child, The child he called son.. No more tomorrows or future plans, All hopes and dreams crashed to an end. Their son is gone, one September morn . One moment in time many lives changed. The mother lost her son, the dad looses his boy, the brothers loose a friend and a daughter will never know her dad. Where did the pain go? His torment, His grief, The pain he could not find a way to release? Did it just go with him down to his grave,or is it left behind with the ones who are left to grieve? Do we now carry the pain he could not bear? when his life abruptly came to an end, did he pass the torche on, the torche of pain and grief, for others to hold to find a way to let go? Jesus, you are here I know in my heart. But the wound is deep. I need your Spirit The God of all comfort, comfort my heart, my soul. The God of this universe, who made all things. Hold me. This burden is too heavy for me to hold. And if I do, I will not survive. Jesus, the Lover of my soul, be my healer and my helper. Hold me. So, were you there with him, until the very end? As he walked to the top, did you stand with him. And when he fell? Did he fall into Your arms. Your Arms of love, that forgives every sin. Even the sin, that can't see no other end? Or did you pick him up when he hit the ground? When he fell to his death, and breathed his last breath, were you with him? did you hold him? Did he look up and see your eyes? Did he see clearly, for the very first time? As you picked him up and carried him home. And are you here, when I can't see, my eyes are blind, darkness surrounds me. Are you hear beyond the darkness and pain? When the darkness creeps in, and covers my soul, the pain takes over, Will you come, to be my Light? This pain that I feel, the pain no mother should ever have to bear, words she should, never have to hear. The words that ring in my head, "Your son has died, he committed suicide." How did I go wrong, what did I do? What did I not give him, Did I not give him enough, or did I give too much? Where did I fail? I need you Lord...today. No more lives lost at such a high cost. We have an enemy who seeks to destroy, he comes to steal, to hurt and kill. Sometimes he wins, but only for awhile. The Morning Star will come. He will make all things right. He will reveal Himself and turn darkness to light. There will be no more pain the tears will be wiped away. All questions will be answered. I have to hold on, until morning breaks, I have to hold on to the final hope, One day, I will see you Matthew. One day, I will see my son.